Mooing Points- the annoying travel edition

My travelling road show has me in some godforsaken northern suburb of Atlanta. Ugh. We are not impressed.

With apologies to Peter King of CNN/SI online (far better of a writer than I), this is my annoying travel note of the week:

Today was one of those days that people in my office who think I have a cushy deal should endure. Let's go to the tape:

-Flight from Baltimore to Atlanta delayed for...who knows why. It's Delta. I have no further comment. Flight is completely full. Because of Delta's "zone" boarding system, I'm one of the last people to board. Two broads who work for the Social Security Administration blatantly cut in front of me in line- apparently working for the government gives you carte blanche. They think it's funny. Lucky me- they're sitting in the row in front of me (aisle seats so I can listen to their banal conversation for the entire flight).
-Flight attendant gives me the seatbelt extension; I don't need or want it. It's snug but closeable. What I could use are another 4" of shoulder room so I don't have to get in the shape of a pretzel for the next two hours.
-We land, and Hartsfield airport is a zoo of humanity- a lot of holiday travelers getting an early start. Goody.
-Normally on my trips I don't have a car; I do on this one because where I'm going is such a hike from the airport. Normally when I do rent I do through Hertz (because Hertz is competent, and, their #1 Club Gold means I don't have to deal with people- I just get in my car and go). This time I'm with Thrifty. Thrifty sucks the big one. First, it's a 20-minute wait at their airport kiosk to check in because the riff-raff in front of me apparently has never rented a car. By the time I see a person, I'm getting steamed. She gives me the bullshit sales pitch about why I must get the coverage; I decline (what an absolute rip-off that insurance coverage bit is)- she's pissed because I've probably cost her the commission on it. More paperwork than you'd need to buy a house and I'm done...not. Now I go wait outside for a shuttle to take me to my car. Except I don't have car keys yet. Wait 10 minutes for shuttle. Get cut off by two old cunts who think being old cunts gives them right to cut in front of me in shuttle queue. Whatever. Shuttle to Thrifty, where I have to wait YET AGAIN to get a key. Except I still don't have a key- I just go to designated space where a car will be waiting. GRRRRRRRRRRRR.
-Thrifty still sucks, because the seat is seriously screwed up, and the trunk isn't open. WHY? Let's think for a moment...people at airport renting cars- first thing they do is put luggage somewhere...right?
-Thrifty sucks more, because the old coot that is their security staff moves at a snail's pace (except I'm being rude to snails). My episode with Thrifty took a little over an hour. Last month I purchased a NEW CAR in the SAME AMOUNT OF TIME.
-The directions the hotel gave me are dead-bang wrong, so I get to drive through this shopping mall complex in Cobb County trying to find this hellhole. Now I'm REALLY STEAMED.
-After two circlings I find hotel. Hotel takes a $125 deposit for ethernet cable so I can use my laptop. Seriously.
-Get to room. Open bag. Now my inner civil libertarian is going postal, because the TSA has chosen to root through my bag, and they haven't exactly been subtle about it. Oh, but they left me this nice "we rooted through your bag and all of your stuff...ha ha!" note. If they want to scan it...go ahead. But please- don't rifle through papers of mine. It's wholly inappropriate and probably illegal. Get your jollies somewhere else.
-Because I'm having stomach problems (the variety I'd just as soon not get into other than to say I wouldn't wish them on you) eating is going to be a challenge, and it is.

To put a nice cherry on top of today's frivolity, word is that the NHL will reject the NHLPA's offer of a 24% rollback in salaries, but may make a counter-offer tomorrow. So my chances of seeing hockey this year are diminishing by the day.